Why do bad things happen to good people? Have you ever asked yourself that question? Good! You're a real and thoughtful human being =;-)
The articles on the key word 'gratitude' have emphasised the importance of this attitude and how it helps us facing the difficulties of life. We've also drawn attention to the importance of humility and forgiveness for those who want to handle life properly. Resentful and bitter attitudes are counterproductive; they harm you and everyone around you. Forgiveness brings freedom; humility carries grace. Gratitude makes us accept the hardships of life in a way that we still appreciate the good things in life despite loss or pain. It empowers to rather find solutions to improve things, than just complain about our problems and fall into victimhood or despair. But when things are tough or seem unfair, the tendency to feel overwhelmed can easily lead to self-pity and victimhood. Most of us have been there. Those of us who realised that resentfulness will make things worse, sought for other, better solutions.
Handle Loss Well
Cutting your losses and trying again with a changed attitude, is a way forward. The emotional scars from loss and defeat are not easily overcome, yet unless we deal with them properly, it will hold us back and blur any positive vision for the future. The pain of the past will keep us a prisoner of the past if we hold on to bitterness. Yet in order to walk into the future freely and happily, we need to let go of the past, learn from it and leave the pain behind us. The future is bright if we deal with the past accurately and make right decisions in the present. Remaining grateful in life helps us to have a clear vision for solutions to problems. Once gratitude is lost, resentment sets in and blurs our vision. Therefore, remain grateful.
A lack of gratitude also carries the dangers of becoming entitled, and that feeds arrogance and pride - which ultimately leads to one's fall! (see Proverbs 18:12). Entitled people - those who go through life resentful thinking others owe them something - are working towards their own destruction. Rather than taking responsibility for their lives, including the consequences of their own failures, they play the blame game. They try to manipulate their way through life to achieve their goals. Yet eventually life catches up on each one of us, as we all reap what we sow. It is therefore better to drop all resentfulness, forgive and let go, and be grateful instead. With the humble is wisdom (Provers 11:2); the humble receive grace (Proverbs 3:34). Things will improve when we constructively work on solutions. Therefore, remain humble and grateful.
Why do Bad Things happen to Good People?
Just recently a good friend of mine asked me why bad things happen to good people - and, worse, why it often takes so long until a positive change comes... tough question to answer, isn't it? What is your answer? Here's mine (in part).
Life is tough and one has to be tough. In some parts of the world one has to be tough just to survive, in other parts to succeed. To make a living and a life, one has to be competent and strong. The career fields in which one seeks to develop and succeed differ greatly, of course, as some areas, for example, finance, are much tougher in terms of competition than others, for example, social care. Each field has its challenges and requires its necessary competence. Not everyone surviving in a tough business environment could care for the sick, elderly or disabled. We should, therefore, not compare wrongly to devalue certain fields. Some people become hardened in a tough world, yet it's best to keep a good heart. In other words, 'a thick skin and a soft heart.' So how do we get tough, or tough enough? As in sports, by training. They say, 'experience is the best teacher,' life 'itself teaches us.' Yet only if we learn properly. There are those who get bitter and those who get better, depending how we deal with life's trials, struggles and difficulties. It has a lot to do with choice and response. Remember, you can't control what happens to you, but you can control how you respond to it.
The biblical encouragement to handle life well and become an overcomer is simple: count the trials as joy! What? Trials are never joyful, but awful! But the right perspective to understand this is that trials make us strong, both in faith and maturity (James 1:2-12). This is the competence necessary to manage life and make it successful. Hence, to answer the question, 'Why do bad things happen to good people?' from this perspective is, that trials are good for us in order to train us to handle life, succeed and prosper (defining success and prosperity is another discussion). It's the necessary training to live life well. As the proverb goes, 'A calm sea doesn't make a good captain.' It's the rough seas, the troubles in the storms and the unknown adventures, that teach people to navigate and survive.
We learn from life, and as we learn we become better. Bad things can lead to good outcomes. We discussed Jospeh in an earlier post. The evil intended against him served for his benefit, both in his promotions, but also, perhaps more so, in the formation of his character to handle power well once it was given to him. He was faithful in small things, and could therefore handle bigger things. It's the same with teaching kids to handle pocket money and involving them in house chores, so they learn the value of money. Joseph was even innocently imprisoned, yet met the key person responsible for his ultimate promotion. Look for the positive in negative circumstances, or, as they say, the 'blessing in disguise.' There was another biblical figure who saw his imprisonment as positive, working in his favour! That's the right outlook on life and its challenging circumstances.
'I Can Do All Things'
This person, who had suffered considerable hardship in life and for serving a good cause, was Saul of Tarsus, better known as the apostle Paul (see 1 Corinthians 4; 2 Corinthians 4). Yet despite the troubles he's been through, he handled life well and taught others to overcome opposition and be victorious despite the trials. His confident claim was that no matter in what condition he finds himself, he 'can do all things' through Christ who strengthened him (Philippians 4:13). The primary issue for him was the supply of strength in the trials of life. 'When the going gets tough, the tough get going,' as the song goes. True, but only if you have the power to go on. Paul knew his source of strength and comfort: Jesus Christ. To be an overcomer, he knew it was 'through Him who loved us' (Romans 8:37), the Messiah Himself. This was more than some nice thought of 'everything happens for a reason.' This is a real power supply. You see, we need both comfort and strength to overcome and succeed. The surpassing power, beyond human abilities, is 'of God' (2 Corinthians 4:7). And so was his adequacy in his work (3:4-6). No matter what you are facing, there's a solution for the problem, an exit for the temptation and an answer to the question. God shows His faithfulness in that He provides a strategy to deal with a given situation (see 1 Corinthians 10:13). The question, therefore, should not be as much, Why is this happening to me? But rather, How can I deal with this properly? And, beyond that, How can I become a better person while going through these trials with the right attitude?
Remaining grateful in life helps us have a clear vision for solutions to problems. Once gratitude is lost, resentment sets in and blurs our vision.
Remain humble and grateful. God empowers us faithfully.
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